• Christine Roslund, MFT, CPC

Making Your Life Your Masterpiece by Overcoming Obstacles

I’ll be the first to say that it is not easy to change, as they say “old habits are hard to break”, and it takes devotions, awareness, perseverance and a huge desire to have what you truly want to create in your life. As mentioned in my January newsletter (maybe we should put a link to Jan newsletter) that it all starts with being clear about what you really want to bring into your life. But, then, it takes some work to make changes happen in your life. We all have obstacles to overcome to in order to make certain things happen in our lives, especially if you want to make a masterpiece of your life and get the most out of it. Most of these obstacles are within ourselves that we are not even aware of. The good news is through when you become aware of these obstacles it frees you up to be able to live the life you want.

There are many kinds of obstacles that may sabotage efforts towards reaching you where you want to be in your life. And, many of them you are most likely not even aware of because they have to do with your underlying beliefs, thoughts and old patterns that are just such a part of you. Or, maybe, you may be aware of some of your obstacles, have tried to change them and been unsuccessful, leaving you feeling a sense of hopelessness, defeat and even failure. If that is the case you may have created more obstacles with through believing that since you’ve tried to work with them and it didn’t shift the way you wanted or long-term it will never and you will not be able to overcome them in the future.

That’s not true! You will be able to overcome your obstacles once you figure out clearly what they are and learn how to work with them so they are not in the driver seat of your life. I encourage you to not give up but to keep opening to figuring it out until you find what works for you. It’s all in how you approach them, and your willingness to play with new ideas, as a way to break through some of them and set them free.

In order to create your life the way you truly want it and your overcome obstacles it is important to identify what they are so you know what you are working with. When you start becoming aware of these underlying processes (thoughts, beliefs, etc) going on inside you that is the first and most important step in your getting back in your own driver’s seat of your life.

Once you are aware of them there are many ways to work with them so they won’t keep holding you hostage to your old ways, and you can be set free to move forward towards your destination. I see this all the time in working with clients doing psychotherapy and life coaching. It just takes a willingness to allow the clearing out the blocks, integrating life experiences and more than anything attaining what I call “corrective” thinking about things that bring about new perspectives that are aligned with you. This is the crux of transformation not only in my clients, but in all of us.

Here is an exercise to experiment with and to help you start identifying some of your obstacles.

Below is a list of common beliefs that sabotage people’s success:

  • It's too difficult

  • I don't deserve it

  • I don't have the resources

  • I don't have the time

  • I can't do it

  • They don't want me to

  • I'm afraid

  1. Did you notice anything that led you astray from your path this past week? If so, try to identify if any of the above mentioned beliefs can be identified as part of the reason.

  2. Once you identify one or more of these common beliefs that created your detour from where you wanted to be going, start reframing that belief by turning it around.

Example: If your identified belief is “I can't do it” try holding the belief “I can do it and I am going to do it”. Think of a time when you did do it and notice how that feels in your body. Or, if your negative belief is “I don’t deserve it” turn it around to “I am deserving”. Think of a time when you felt like you worked hard for something that paid off. Notice how that feels in your body. Or, if your negative belief this week was “I’m afraid” turn it around to “It’s okay to be afraid and I am going to do it anyways”. Think of a time when you pushed yourself when you were afraid and what that payoff was for doing that. Notice how that feels in your body.

Noticing how that feels in your body when you turn it around as opposed to holding the negative thought allows you to start releasing your obstacles and allowing for an openness within yourself. Through remembering those times when you "did do it", pushed yourself through fear to get what you really wanted or when you did felt deserving of something you put the energy into that made you feel proud” all of those things starts chipping away at your obstacles and creates the possibility of something different.

This is a start to identifying what your obstacles are, your negative thinking and beliefs. Then, you can begin to learn about how to reprogram your thoughts and beliefs. You can change but it is going to take some conscious effort to make that happen. Once you get in the practice of doing this work it does get easier and the patterns and beliefs shift. At the beginning if this is new for you, it will take some time. Be patient and gentle with yourself and know that it is going to pay off in the long run.

You are worth it and deserve to be living the life you want to and can create your life to be your masterpiece if that’s what you want! Please feel free to contact me to let me know how it is going. I am here to support you!

#overcomingobstacles #lifecoaching #overcomingfear

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